So today there was I, again in the situation that my friend is hiding me up again. Not literally, but the same meaning. I've met quite some friends, they don't like people to know my existence, I don't know why either. Maybe I'm too hideous? Or I'm just a shame to them? Nah, I know they just don't want to expose me to their friends, or their clique, something like that. As weird as it sounds.
So today there was I. Again in the situation, I was eating with two guys and shushan
And both of the boys have girlfriends already, which don't bother me at all, of course lol. And a girlfriend called one of the boy, and the first thing he did before doing the gesture to answer the phone call, was another gesture to put me in silent. The shh sign. I hated that. A lot.
But what could I say? He doesn't want his girlfriend to know I'm there, even though it's really just pure friendship between all of us.
I don't know, I just dislike that kind of feeling that I'm being hidden again. I was thinking, am I such an embarrassment to them? That they can't let their friends know about my existence? Talked about it with shushan, and of course she solved this question of mine. She said, if they didn't want their friends know about us, why would he borrow the helmets FROM his friends?
Yea being the sensitive eening in the midnight, that's what I'm usually thinking anyway.
I'm just afraid of the past repeating itself again.
How long will it take to let this fade away
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